1 Timothy 5:3
Pr Edsel Locot
“…know how to discern who are the widows…”
~5 min read
In obedience to the instructions of God, the Apostle Paul made it clear that widows must be honoured. He instructed Timothy to “honour widows that are widows indeed” (1 Timothy 5:3). The word “honour” in this context signifies the expressing of esteem by material and financial support. Paul specified that it is only given to genuine widows (i.e. “widows indeed”), who are truly in need, and had no family to sustain them. So, Timothy must know how to discern who are the widows worthy to receive “honour” and who are not, so that the resources of the church will not be wasted. Matthew Henry rightly said, “Charity misplaced is a great hindrance to true charity; there should be prudence in the choice of the objects of charity, that it may not be thrown away upon those who are not properly so, that there may be the more for those who are real objects of charity.” Charity begins at home. The Apostle Paul made it very clear to Timothy that the responsibility of supporting a widow lies first with her family (v. 4). Piety must be first shown at home. A Christian man or woman who has a widow living in the family is to support her, “for that is good and acceptable before God”. This is also to spare the church from being unnecessarily burdened. “If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed” (v. 16). The family members and loved ones must first care for and honour their own widows. If a believer does not materially support or care for his own widow, “(especially) for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel” (v. 8)!
Barnes commented, “Even the pagans acknowledged the obligation to provide for their relatives. This was one of the great laws of nature written on their hearts, and a law which they felt bound to obey. Nature dictates that to everyone, his own children and relatives should be most dear. Every man should take care of his own family. A Christian should not be inferior to an unbeliever in respect to any virtue.” A Christian who professes faith in the holy and just God must show piety at home by honouring and caring for his aged parents.
Traits Of True Widows
Notwithstanding, the church has a responsibility to look out for and help those widows who are genuinely in need. Who are the widows “qualified” to receive honour and support? The qualifications (or prerequisites) are cited by Paul in 1 Timothy 5:5—“Now she that is a widow indeed, and desolate, trusteth in God, and continueth in supplications and prayers night and day.”
Firstly, she is known to be desolate, that is, having no family to take care of her basic needs (v. 5a). She has no children or other descendants; there is none on whom she could depend for support (though she knows full well that she can depend wholly upon the Lord God Almighty). Here is where the family of God comes in. The church will not support widows who have children and loved ones at home. The church should only support and honour widows who have no family to take care of them.
Secondly, she ought to possess certain spiritual qualities (v. 5b). She “trusteth in God”. Having no earthly reliance and no one else to look to, she steadily looks to God for consolation and support. She lives her Christian life faithfully. Her true source of joy and comfort is the one living and true God. As such, she “continueth in supplications and prayers night and day”. She commits herself to prayer unto God—not just for herself, but also for others in the church and community. The Bible speaks of one such exemplary worthy widow named Anna, who “departed not from the temple, but served God with fastings and prayers night and day” (as recorded for us in Luke 2:36-37). That’s not all; other prerequisites have to be considered as well. She has to be 60 years of age and above, as well as “having been the wife of one man” (v. 9). This implies marital fidelity, and that there has been no divorce or polygamy in her past. Furthermore, she must be “well reported of for good works” (v. 10). In other words, she has had a good testimony of hospitality, and has been known to “do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith” (Galatians 6:10). She has been kind to others; surely kindness should be extended to her in her time of adversity (cf. Luke 6:38).
Traits of Unworthy Widows
On the other hand, the church is to discern those widows who are unworthy to receive honour. Those who indulge in a carnal and luxurious lifestyle, having “lived in (worldly) pleasure” (v. 6) are to be excluded. Such widows are as good as spiritually dead. Besides, the church should also refuse widows who are “idle”, “tattlers” (i.e. gossipers) and “busybodies” (v. 13).
Moreover, the same stance is taken regarding widows who are comparatively younger, that is below 60 years of age. They are not past the age of marriage and may still remarry, which (if in the context of a Christian marriage) is acceptable in the sight of God (v. 14). However, younger widows who rebel against Christ, in that they remarry outside of His will (i.e. by marrying people of whom the Lord disapproves), is abomination in the sight of God (v. 11). In particular, a younger widow (who still has great physical desire to have a family) may indiscriminately marry an unbeliever. Such is said to be “having damnation” (v. 12). When a widow remarries outside of the will of the Lord, she incurs judgment (damnation) from the Lord because she has “cast off ” her first faith, in that she has put aside the biblical principle of separation from sin and her loyalty to Christ. Because of these reasons, younger widows should be discreetly excluded from receiving support and honour from the church.
Conclusion
Scripture clearly instructs believers to give honour unto widows. So, let every man and woman who professes faith in Christ honour widows at home, if any. It must be done with great joy and zeal, being a follower of Christ. God forbid that any Christian should forsake widows and aged parents; “… despise not thy mother when she is old” (Proverbs 23:22b). Let the house of every Christian be a God-honouring family, with children honouring widows indeed at home. Unquestionably, next to the home, the role to honour widows who are widows indeed is also given to the church. The church must carry the burden to maintain and sustain those who are widows indeed in the church, even encouraging them to serve in the church with purity of heart and with unfeigned faith. Amen.
Pr Edsel Locot
Gethsemane Bible-Presbyterian Church (Bohol, Philippines)
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